People like to use the “F” word and one day I was thinking about how to put a positive spin on it.  I saw several life categories starting with F that needed attention.  I wrote in my journal back then (early 2000’s):

·      Faith.

·      Family.

·      Friends.

·      Finances.

·      Fitness.

·      Fulfillment.

·      Fun.

In the school of life at the time of my writing, my husband and I were scoring “Fs” in all subjects!   I remember praying a prayer decree something like:

Lord, I want to leave a legacy of freedom for my children and their children and their children’s children.  I desire victory over the seven Fs!  I am a woman of great faith! I am in love with my husband no matter what we are going through!  All my family relationships are healed and restored. I have many friends who love me and with whom I am sharpened!  I love numbers because You drafted a book on the subject!  I come under my husband’s authority, and we work together towards financial freedom!   We have no debts!  Our house is paid for!  We own property!  It’s all Yours, Heavenly Father!  I love to exercise and move my body!  I am healthy and eating healthy!  I am fulfilled loving You, serving You and having fun serving Your people!  Even when I don’t see it, I know You are at work in my life! 

I am leaving a legacy of freedom on every mountain of my influence!  Our family’s future generations will dream with You and become Your world changers!  I want to be remembered as the woman who changed lives!  She had a big smile and a big laugh and knew how to have fun!

NOW THE BACKSTORY

My husband and I had a couple life-altering events in our twenties that brought us both to our knees.  Through those experiences, our spiritual roots went deeper than we thought possible.  By our early thirties, we’d matured in our Christian faith more than many do in a lifetime.  

After a brief reprieve, we saw our lives were still a mess in other areas.  We had messy relationships and messy finances. Then our health got messy.  Fast forward thirty years.  While we were doing ok, I was passionless and despondent. 

What’s your personality?  I’m a “wild Type A” personality.  A little all-over-the-map in a semi-organized way.  Who still gets stuff done even when I’m not operating at 100%.  Everyone’s wired differently.  (Read Psalm 139.)  Regardless of your wiring, did you know it’s a biblical principle to write your dreams? 

Read Habakkuk 2: 3 (NIV):

“Write down the revelation
    and make it plain on tablets
    so that a herald may run with it.
For the revelation awaits an appointed time;
    it speaks of the end
    and will not prove false.
Though it linger, wait for it;
    it will certainly come
    and will not delay.

When we write our dreams and goals down on paper, an angel (herald) is dispatched from heaven with an order to make it happen!  And we don’t need to get discouraged if it’s slow coming true because it WILL COME TO PASS RIGHT ON TIME!  

Do you still dream and dare to write them on a piece of paper?  While I was homemaker and career entrepreneur, I was always dreaming and setting goals (and achieving most of them). 

Then I retired.  And stopped dreaming and setting goals.  That was seven long years ago already!  A few years back, I got up off the couch with this rolling around in my brain:

“You have everything to be glad about. 

What are you so sad about?”

Don’t you love it when God asks you rhetorical questions?  The younger me would have caught that in a minute and taken some action.  Are you a little slow on the uptake sometimes like me?   While I’ve had sweet times with Jesus since retirement, I was still on the struggle bus!  Everything was GOOD on the outside.  WHY WAS I SO SAD on the inside?

HERE IS WHAT WAS WRONG AND WHY I WAS SAD:  I walked into retirement without a revelatory word from God.  I stopped dreaming!  I stopped hearing and seeing God’s dream for me!   No wonder I was sad and stumbling!

Proverbs 29: 18 (MSG) says:

If people can’t see what God is doing,
    they stumble all over themselves;
But when they attend to what he reveals,
    they are most blessed.

DARE TO DREAM AGAIN

Last fall, crazy of all crazy, I thought I heard God tell me to start a writers’ group.  He told me I needed some accountability.  After writing my idea down, I put the idea out through my local church, prayed for a multi-generational group of women, and God’s angels directed them to me!  With encouragement and accountability, I started writing regularly in a journal again.  It’s been super therapeutic!  I get up and just start writing. 

I’d forgotten how fun it was to dream and set a goal.  And the “helpers’ high” of achieving a goal and seeing others do the same!  I had to get back to dreaming because how was I going to pave the way, leave a legacy of dreaming for future generations if I wasn’t doing it myself?! 

Okay, enough about the dreaming thing.  You get the idea!  

Back to the F words.

FAITH. Check!

My hubs and I have been through many trials together.  Jesus is Our Rock.  We have been “like a wise man [and woman] who built his [their] house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods came, and the winds blew and beat on that house, but it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock.” Matthew 7: 24-25 (ESV)  My faith is solid. God is faithful!  

FAMILY.  Check!

I didn’t always love and respect my mother.  I didn’t always get along with my siblings.  I raised my kids yelling and screaming (like my mother).  “I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears.” Psalm 34: 4 (NIV)

He showed me how to see my family through His eyes of compassion.  It wasn’t easy.  “I was blind but now I see.”  John 9: 25 (NIV) “Call to me and I will answer you and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”  Jeremiah 33: 3 (ESV)  “But you, O Lord, are a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness.” Psalm 86: 15 (ESV)

FRIENDS. Check!

I have had friends backstab me.  I’ve also let friends down.  “Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense.” Proverbs 19: 11 (ESV) “For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.” James 3: 16 (ESV) “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Ephesians 4: 32 (ESV) “Friends come and friends go, but a true friend sticks by you like family.” Proverbs 18: 24 (MSG)

FINANCES. (In Progress!)

I don’t know how to handle money.  This one is a still a stronghold in my life. And I admit it. Still dealing with this one but making progress.  So grateful for my patient husband who prays for me.  I can still remember asking him after spending some money at the mall in my thirties, “Aren’t you going to yell at me?”  He answered, “No, I’m just going to talk to Holy Spirit about it.”  (At the time, we were a single-income family so I could homeschool our children.)

Someday, I’ll write a piece on strongholds and how I have dealt with them.  Most victoriously, but a couple have more chains to break!  Stay tuned.

FITNESS.  (In Progress!)

I am secure in who I am and what I look like.  I can look in the mirror naked and think, ‘Wow, that’s a lot of woman to love!  And God loves you so much, girl!”  No shame.  At the same time, I struggle with energy.  Twenty pounds ago has only happened twice in 20 years.  I used to picture myself in a normal sized coffin, thinking I may not lose weight until the end of my life!  It’s progress for me to think in terms of, “I AM NOT WAITING UNTIL I’M DEAD!”

I used to walk 3-4 miles a day.  For YEARS.  Every day, six days a week, rested on Saturdays.  Even through all my pregnancies and after four deliveries! AND I PRAYED while I walked. In my mid-fifties, we started having multiple grands.  I wanted to be a “hands on” Nana, and I gradually gave up my daily walks.

Not a good idea when one is over sixty!  I’ll write a post on this stronghold in the future, too!  Yes, it’s a stronghold because I can’t just decide to eat less and move my body.  When you can’t choose to do the right thing, you’re dealing with a stronghold.  Stay tuned for more on that!

FULFILLMENT. (Check!)

I have felt fulfilled in everything I’ve done. I have served God. I’ve loved my family, and I’ve loved people. I have thoroughly enjoyed my career leading my household, church ministry groups, and teams in two network marketing businesses.  I don’t know how to do a bad job at anything!  I’m not being pompous; just saying, I am wired for excellence!   Have I made mistakes?  Oh, you betcha!   I have taken my stumbles to the Lord, and He has transformed me and made it good!   “Purify me from my sins, and I will be clean; wash me, and I will be whiter than snow.”  Psalm 55: 7 (NLT) “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” Romans 8: 28 NIV

FUN! (Check!)

This is my favorite F!  Girls just wanna have fun. Having survived the two major losses in my life (mentioned previously), I have learned to live in the moment.  Stuff is temporal.  People are the only thing I’m going to take with me when I die!  Life can be discouraging and hard, and I live to encourage others and make them smile.  Of course, I have down days as I’ve already confessed in this piece.  I FELT SAD because I lost my vision.  God always cheers me up!  “A glad heart makes a cheerful face; but an aching heart breaks the spirit.” Proverbs 15: 13 (NCV) 

Rejoicing in what I have in the moment and not focusing on what I don’t have keeps me happy!  “Be glad in the Lord and rejoice!” Psalm 32: 11 (ESV)

There are my seven F’s!  I decided a long, long time ago I would get victory over every mountain before I go to be with Jesus.  I’m on the way!  Stay tuned for my struggles with FITNESS and FINANCES in upcoming months! 

Overcoming every mountain, one by one!

”I tell you the truth, you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, fall into the sea.’ And if you have no doubts in your mind and believe that what you say will happen, God will do it for YOU!” Mark 11: 23 (NCV)